“[A]n ORCHESTRA plays STRAVINSKY, I read THE WASTE LAND, I WRITE FURIOUSLY at a desk, I WRITE FURIOUSLY on a chalkboard, I SMASH a glass, and ANOTHER, and ANOTHER, WATCHING the SHARDS skid across the floor”. 

Christopher Nolan, Oppenheimer

Throwing Glass

Dear Scholarship Donors and/or LilyPad reader (whichever one seems appropriate; I’ll explain this later),

At the time of writing this, Christopher Nolan’s hit film Oppenheimer released in theaters a mere 6 months ago. It’s set to win the appraisal of the greater film industry at the upcoming Academy Awards, and it’s already won the hearts of millions of movie-goers (along with a billion USD at the international box office). The excerpt above is a fragment of its screenplay, depicting physicist J. Robert Oppenheimer as he throws wine glasses at the wall.

This Scholarship Letter/published article is not about J. Robert Oppenheimer. He already had a movie made about him (a great one at that). Instead, I mention the movie because of Oppenheimer’s actions during this particular scene: the glass throwing. Oppenheimer isn’t chucking glass because he’s angered or violent. He throws them because he’s a quantum physicist.

Going Quantum

In the immediate preceding scene, Neils Bohr, a renowned physicist best known for the Bohr Atomic Model and for Bohrium (Bh on the Periodic Table), presents a young Robert with the following ponder:

“The important thing isn’t can you read music, it’s can you hear it. Can you hear the music, Robert?”

Bohr is referring to the concept of quantum mechanics. It isn’t something to understand, because it simply doesn’t make sense. Instead, it’s something you accept for what it is. You don’t read it or see it. You hear it.

What are you listening for? Well luckily for you, I’m currently in Professor Beckford’s Chemistry 110 section, and have built a convenient understanding of quantum mechanics in the four days of lecture we’ve had so far. Here’s my understanding:

There exists an object called an electron in all atoms. For decades, scientists were certain that the electron existed as a tiny, tiny ball. It does. But that’s not all it is. It was later uncovered that the electron is also a wave, like sound waves or ripples across an ocean surface. But how can the electron be both a ball and a wave? It shouldn’t be. And yet it is. For any physicist, this is the kind of thing that makes you want to throw glass at a wall. This is what we call a paradox, a contradictory statement that is still somehow true. 

Why do I bring all of this up? Because quantum mechanics is built on the idea that things can be true, even if it’s illogical. It’s a paradox, endlessly difficult yet intriguingly beautiful. Perhaps Oppenheimer threw the wine glass out of anger, a spite for the world. It is possible that Oppenheimer instead destroyed the half-dozen chalices due to curiosity. Or perhaps because it makes him happy to hear the shatter. Who’s to say that there cannot exist multiple reasons at once. This concept is profound yet mind-boggling. Paradoxes don’t have a single definite answer, and so the most logical step is to accept its reality and, if possible, find some enjoyment from the answers you do find. In this essence, you don’t read the paradox. You listen to it. You might as well turn on your favorite musical artist, sit back, and drift away because oftentimes (especially in quantum physics) the reality of the paradox is too complicated to comprehend. Yet, the comprehensible parts can still be enjoyed, even built upon.

But if paradox exists in quantum physics, where else can it be found? Quantum mechanics serves as the foundation to atoms. Atoms form molecules. Molecules form compounds. Compounds form rocks and animals and humans and ecosystems and the Earth, the Sun, the galaxy, and everything in between. If life itself is built on quantum physics, and quantum physics is a paradox, then does that make life a paradox?

Can You Hear the Music?

Perhaps life should be a paradox. This piece of writing sure is. It is meant to exist as a gratitude letter for the eyes of all Duke Kunshan Scholarship Donors, whether they be alumni, industry leaders, or philanthropists. Yet, it’s also meant to show my opinion on a particular topic for the readers of The LilyPad, DKU’s premier student-led publication. This sounds entirely contradictory because it is. In fulfilling the requirements of one piece of writing, it seems to shatter what is standard of the other. By reading this, scholarship donors get a sense of who I am as a scholarship recipient, but this clearly is not a normal letter. Meanwhile, this “letter” is still taking up a page in this issue of The LilyPad. As I edit this paragraph for The LilyPad, I am simultaneously submitting it to the scholarship link. This article/letter is neither an article nor a letter. And yet it is still both, because I want it to be. Its existence, while flawed and a little absurd, is still (I hope) fun to read. Intrigue is still able to spew from every word I type, so long as you stop reading what the purpose of this is and just begin to enjoy each word anyway.

If this can exist as a paradox then perhaps life, like quantum physics, can also exist paradoxically. Perhaps you can hate someone’s actions but still love them for who they are. Perhaps a class can be unnecessarily difficult, but still be valuable. Perhaps having a few close friends is better than a large group of acquaintances. Or why not have both? Heck, combine the ideas and have a large group of close friends?

The existence of quantum mechanics should serve as proof to us that many things can exist at once. Meanwhile, the human experience shows that many things can exist at once even if you, or others, don’t think it can or should. Keeping this in mind, I suggest you go make life what you want it to be. If something sparks your curiosity, perhaps it is worth an exploration.

My exploration is this article/letter. So, to my scholarship donors, I appreciate your contributions, as they’ve opened the doors for me, a Global Health/Biology major, to explore journalism, politics, and music instead. I hope the existence of this rather existentialist piece of writing is proof that your donations are creating something. To the reader, stop reading and get excited. Start a club or a conversation. Find a new passion. Chase every opportunity. Throw a glass at the wall. Maybe finish your homework too.

The point: the only bearing as to what can be achieved is what you set out to achieve in the first place. Thus, stop looking around. Stop trying to make sense of everything. And stop making everything so logical. Be a little illogical, close your eyes, and listen.

Can you hear the music?